People losing their cool is not uncommon these days. In fact what starts as a technique to get things done soon becomes a habit for many of us. People get angry over petty things. Little things are enough to spoil an entire day if not more. Why does this happen? Why do people get angry? What is the repercussion of getting angry?
If you read any piece of literature on Indian Philosophy you are bound to find that the root cause of all anger is the possibility of unfulfilled desires. If anything comes in the way of what we expect, the almost immediate outcome is agitation and anger. Most often the anger is diverted on the person / thing that comes in the way of your achievement or path. While the anger is justified what happens as a result of this expression of anger is inflicting physical or mental hurt to an object/ person. This then serves as a trigger for one more person to react. This person (if he is not matured enough to understand that it is just a trigger!) then carries a seed of this effect and waits for the next opportunity to pass on this emotion – anger at another object / person.
This is very easy to understand. Just think back over the last few days if you have come across any person, spouse, parents, siblings, colleagues, bosses, clients, vendors, etc who at your slightest provocation or over a really petty issue, lost his/her temper and ended up speaking number of things he/she would have never intended to say? Almost always we come across situations like these and there may have been times where we have been that angry person!
Why get angry? Why spoil the mood of ourselves and others? All because things did not go according to our plan – according to our expectations! So apart from hurting all around us – which some of us realize the moment the anger leaves us, who is getting hurt the most? Us! Anger is said to hurt the immunity system of our body. One does not require scientific proof for this. Just look at yourself when you get angry next – you allow your blood pressure to rise, your heart beat rises, you sweat, your tremble, you expend energy unnecessarily, you lose your cool and do you think all these symptoms are taking place without any changes in your body?
So the next time something irritates you and you are getting angry, try to stop yourself and ask if all of the above physiological and psychological changes to the body and mind is needed at all? There are two fundamental ways to overcome anger and this I will share in the next Wednesday blog! Till then just think about the last 3 instances you got angry and lost your cool, and try to find the underlying reason for your anger! You will be in for some surprises!